Sunday, June 1, 2008

Around the Grid

Newbie Escapes Orientation Island

Second Life newcomer Jacques Horowitz completed his tasks on Orientation Island and joined the Second Life community today, in spite of a baffling HUD jammed into his face and an incomprehensible inventory and clothing system that resulted in a wooden pyramid on his head.

He was the first new user in the last 1,000 that was not an alt or a bot that managed to escape the flaming pits of Satan.

Second Life Herald Embarrassing

The Second Life Herald today published an article that made no sense, sources reported. The article began with a poem about a sailboat, broke off into some mushy chat speak, and concluded with a histrionic warning about notecard hackers.

SL Avatars Deceptive, Journalist Declares

According to a new report by a highly paid tech journalist for a mainstream media corporation, avatars in Second Life aren't always what they seem.

"See that buxom blonde girl? Might be a guy," he reported. "That guy over there, six feet tall and flexing? He is probably overweight in first life."

The journalist was given additional air time to explain his amazing discoveries which nobody else on the whole Internets ever thought of or even considered before this shining genius came down from heaven on a ray of light and illuminated the darkness with his light bulbs of truth and lanterns of brilliancy.

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