Around the Grid

Gorean Application Completed

Second Life resident Bunnypet Hugsalot finally completed her application to the Land of Snakes and Honey Gorean roleplay today. She finished reading seventy notecards, filled out fourteen separate forms, and agreed to install the Comet Cursor spyware virus in order to be permitted to wear the newbie outfit and proceed onto the sim.

She was promptly yelled at then ignored.


Second Life Reuters Says "Nothing Happened"

No Linden Lab CEOs were hired or fired, no money-wasting Fortune 500 corporate Frankenstein sims were created or destroyed, and John Stewart did not make fun of Second Life residents, Reuters reported today.


Congresswoman Still Searching for Al-Qaeda in Second Life

Although a think tank report suggested that the idea of terrorists using of Second Life was "kind of stupid," Congresswoman Jane Harman (D-CA) continued to search for terrorists in Second Life.

"Someone must remain vigilant," she said, while shoving tips down the panties of swaying naked dancers on Ecstasy Island. "Terrorists are lurking in the metaverse," she added later, while visiting a shemale cathouse. "I'll keep searching until I find them!" she said, while rubbing up naked against everyone in a freebie sex dungeon.


:o

Tiny Dancing Events Calendar For May

As part of our ongoing commitment to bring you the best coverage possible of the metaverse, we are pleased to offer you our editors' choices for the most interesting and most important events for May.

Office Hours

May, TBD, the Organic Temple of Mephisto

New CEO "M Linden" shall briefly dignify the world with his presence when he deigns fit. Although he shall be AFK during this time, your beseeching, lamenting, and teeth-gnashing shall be logged, and one Wish shall be granted to the petitioner who is most humble and pleasing to the infernal majesty of His ears.

Click for SLURL

Cinco de Mayo

May 5, all day, Isla del Sol Sim

To celebrate the young Republic of Mexico's victory over an invading French army at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, avatar Homer Delgado is giving away exploding piñata boobs.

Click for SLURL

Sigmund Freud's Birthday

May 6, all day, Vienna Institute for International Freudianism

Get coked up and come on down! The Institute is submitting free chatbot psychoanalysis all month long, plus complimentary Archetype Pipes for the guys and for you girls, naughty Freudian Slips are half off.

Click for SLURL

"Hill-blazers" Whistle Stop

May 11, 9 PM, Club Cherri Red

Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton will make a surprise appearance at Club Cherri Red in order to shore up the base among her core constituency: transgendered online prostitutes. Photography will not be permitted except on the provided "shaking hands" poseballs please.

Click for SLURL

Best Catgirl Marathon

May 1 - 31, Black Box Nightclub

The Black Box Nightclub will be holding 744 back-to-back one hour "Best Catgirl" competitions for a grand prize of $500L. Catcalls, caterwauling and catfights will not be permitted except in the specially marked catbox. Mew! ^n_n^

Click for SLURL

^__^